28.8.06

Joe Leland



RETRO.
AND .
A.
MEAN.
CUP.
OF.
JAVA.
DANKA MR. RUSSEL MORINE AND MARC PINATE!

PROGRESSION

HEY OUT THERE IN VIRTUAL REALITY LAND!
Listen my ego needs stroking, my self esteem needs a bath, the chin of my desire has been punched by the Ali of boredom, and damn what a K.O.
I would like to believe that i am as brilliant, and beautiful as i pretend to be. This constant need to be validated has caused me to question my sincerity, as an "artist" I have a hard time calling myself an "Artist", what the hell does that mean any way?
you can turn taking a shit into an artform, or waging war, or making love, or stealing, killing, even sleeping even making Noise.
I can only justify surrendering to this creative urge by, looking at all the "things" in my life because of this affliction..The Good, The Bad, The Beautiful, The things ill never talk about...The beautiful...Little 7 month old wonder and her mother...That amaze me and keep me in awe.
Be well assured that insecurity is only the assumption that security always a work in progress.
NEXT STAGE:



You Tube confessional: IN DEFENSE OF NOT KEEPING IT REAL.



Here it is:
I admit that i am wowed at times by the infinite windows and doors on the web.
Yes i am one of those silly people who follows some trends, or gets sucked in by the "hip" factor
so this is what brings me to this post.
I was looking for the newest post from Outkast and This beautifully strange brother who IM sure ill talk more about later.
T.I. had a link on the outkast page...blah blah blah..
Here it is..CHECK OUT THIS LINK...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQ_XqclQb-o&mode=related&search=
watch the video then come back and read the following.

Hello welcome back..

Now i wanted to respond to the responses. But my rambling was cut off...
YOU TUBE SAYS
"You have recently posted several comments.
Please wait some time before posting another."

So ill just post what i wanted to say here...
HERE
I thought T.I. Was as respectful and decent, to himself as any real Man would be. He has an innate and seasoned understanding.
The situation, if it were a real situation that involved law enforcement, He knows as most of us do in reality land that; The Police are not your friends, you do not argue with the cops,(resistance is futile, and could be hazardous to your freedom and health) that's what courts and attorneys are for, *Most (not all) cops are either closet racists, full out,on and raging racists, bullies, malajusted, angry, nasty, brutes etc.. Or all of the above.

* There are actually, some cops who have good intentions, are honorable, and do not have a bully complex.
I grew up around cops, my mother worked for juvenile services, and the chief of police in Birmingham, and ironically, i received a "citizenship award for saving a cops life in 1990. So no, IM not a cop hater...i just hate racists, bullies, and injustice.

And in a situation where the largest, most well equipped, well-trained gang has you in a corner...Sometimes being an O.G. seems moot. If you have any idea about American prisons Inc. You would understand the dread of the cage. It seems to me that T.I. has found a backdoor into legitimacy, success, respect, and the American dream...
Who wouldnt want to hold on to that?

The system could not break his spirit obviously he is driven by something stronger than statistical woes that befall many Af-AMER men. I celebrate him not "keeping" it real. I hear stories all the time about "keeping it real". The only realness about this is that funeral homes and prisons stay busy.
No matter what you do someone is always looking for what you didnĂ‚’t do or the worst thing you did. Did he run? no. Did he rat out others or point the finger at his boys? no. He didnĂ‚’t implicate anyone, he just kept his cool stated that, they were fucking with his money (nicely so)
And that he didn’t know what the fuck they were smoking.
I am willing to bet T.I has put in some work in the dirty south and beyond...Im sure he aint shit to fuck wit' But.but when you are clocking the kind of dollars he is now...you don’t have to continue to live like some desperate Brother in the ghetto...
He gained my respect as a human with his attitude. And before that as an actor.the music is on an outkastilistic growth spurt. Keep your eyes on this one son!
TV on the Radio says:" You are staring at the SUN."

21.8.06

Phases.





This time, right then, right now.
this ongoing work...is here now... But first, Is brute a good thing?

(A Painting REpost...STiLL Fresh!)

13.8.06

Smoke at the prom.

Progressive WORK : Attention cravings: NEW NEWNESS

Work(s) in progress.
I have this near phobic timidness. And yes, surely one of many phobic type concerns/issues/inclinations.
This one in-per-tick- cue-lar, concerns , art doings. Going to museums, even on the free half price, buy one get one free days.
Or Art openings, even if the latest stankless D.J/ hipster projects will all be there, looking as artsy as only a sexy artist can.
Its not that i do not fit into any of the categories, that would allow me a Moses spreading the social sea entrance. Hell IM so COY- COOL -AVANT GARDE like I could freeze linseed oil with one art signification, or dissolve a Duchamp with sun RA reference.
IM coooooolllllllllllll.....So damn coooooololllllllllll...
Back to the, the. I went to the De Young, with the FAB Fam, and Rolf.
I saw something that made me understand, again that this urge and dictation of feeling, images, sound, color, breath...
has nothing to do with me, IM not a special one, IM one of the special. And one is connected to two to three and so on.
It all adds, up...
A receptacle, vessel, conduit. This Urge And curiosity has nothing to do with, impressing anyone, being known as a name.
A name whose work is left on the opposite side of CUL de sac, watching you look for who you are, in mirrors of style and mis- leading verbatim.
A Name is not a verb.
And originality is not given nor is it replaceable. I have been busing myself. Concerning the why with the now's objective.

Walking around in awe of endeavors discourse. For whatever reason, someone took the time and effort to expose them selves. In my mind exposure means exhibition. And I get cold easily when naked...

I NEED TO BE WARMED BY :

LOOK AND WATCH THESE PAINTINGS, LOOK FOR SMOKE...





6.8.06

And yeah Man. (Know what Im saying?)

today, isaw a happy face.
It poked and proded my inside, my outside.

Dread feeds the hope of consequence,
They like you better when they dont know you at all.

happy faces upside down.

i see thru fog
my thoughts quick and keen.

some dash
some get dashed
a world filled with dashing dashers
dashing the dashed

Am i afro punk?
a punk with no afro
punkless afro.

i was talking about a face i saw, right?
I get lost in here sometimes,
enough head space only for you and your selves..Right?

About that face
the one that saw me too..
the one facing backwards behind me.

THE TRYING IS WORTH THE TRIALS.

3.8.06

SONG FROM HERE.


I WENT TO THE WATER, I LOOKED IN ITS COOL.
IN THE DISTANCE WAS A VELVET MOON,BEHIND GLASS SHIMMERING WITH DELIGHT.

I SAW MY FACE , IT WAS SLOWLY WARM AND IT LOOKED TO ME, LIKE IT HAD SEEN IT ALL.
BUT WHAT IS ALL IN THIS FINAL PLACE .

ISAW MY NFACE STARING BACK AT ME.
ASKING QUESTIONS , ASKING QUESTIONS....

THEY SAY WHO YOU KNOW DICTATES YOUR FATES PATH.

HOW MANY TIMES WILL I NAVIGATE THIS ROAD?
THE PATH THRU MY SOUL....I STILL GET LOST.

WHAT WILL IT TAKE TO FEEL AT EASE...
TO KILL THE FEAR, THAT IS KILLING ME?
I SEE MY FACE AND IT GETTING OLD..
TIRED OF SINGING A MUTED SONG.
I HAVE QUESTIONS
I AM CURIOUS..
I SEE YOUR FACE
THE MIRROR OF ME
AFRAID TO SMILE, AFRIAD TO SPEAK...
TO WRAPPED UP IN YOUR REFLECTION
TO NOTICE ME.