CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHY?

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9
Good health is merely the
slowest possible rate at
which one can die.

Number 8 (love this one!)
Men have two emotions:
Hungry & Horny. If you see him
without an erection, make him
a sandwich.

Number 7
Give a person a fish & you feed
them for a day; teach a person
to use the Internet & they
won't bother you
for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky..........
not really good for anything, but
you still can't help but smile
when you shove them
down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel
stupid someday, lying in
hospitals dying of
nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from
the weather. It pays no attention
to criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost
you two hundred dollars and a
substantial tax cut saves
you thirty cents?

Number 2
In the 60s, people took acid to make
the world weird. Now The world is
weird and people take Prozac
to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1
THOUGHT FOR 2007:

We know exactly where one cow with
Mad-cow-disease is located among
the millions of cows in America, but
we haven't got a clue as to where
thousands of illegal immigrants
& terrorists are located.

Maybe we should put the
Department of Agriculture
in charge of immigration.....?

tAKEN FROM SCRUVZ (I WISH I HAD COME UP WITH THESE JEWELS)